FunnyLifeQuotes4u -

Funny Life Quotes 4U

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

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Groucho Marx

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

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Woody Allen

Friends: people who borrow my books and set wet glasses on them.

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Edwin Arlington Robinson

The baby is fine, the only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.

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Woody Allen

The poor wish to be rich. The rich wish to be happy. The happy wish to be married. The married wish to be dead.

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Ann Landers

It’s hard to be funny when you have to be clean.

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Mae West

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.

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Benjamin Franklin

Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

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Harry S. Truman.

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.

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Anonymous

I have enjoyed life a lot more by saying yes than by saying no.

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Source

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

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Mel Brooks

I don’t recognize you – I’ve changed a lot.

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Oscar Wilde

A difference of tastes in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

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George Eliot

Love is my sword, goodness my armor, and humor my shield.

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Unknown

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

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Henry Youngman