Funny Life Quotes Page 5
You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Roumania.” —-Dorothy Parker
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. ——Oscar Wilde
You’re alive. Do something. The directive in life, the moral imperative was so uncomplicated. It could be expressed in single words, not complete sentences. It sounded like this: Look. Listen. Choose. Act. —-Barbara Hall
After a year in therapy, my psychiatrist said to me, ”Maybe life isn”t for everyone.
Eat right, exercise daily, live clean, die anyway.
Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you’re alive, it isn’t. —-Richard Bach
In spite of the cost of living, it’s still popular. —-Kathy Norris
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don’t want any more kids. —–Composed Catastrophe
God is nothing more than a comedian performing in front of an audience that is to afraid to laugh. —–LITTLE MISS FREAKING SUNSHINE
Steak is something which has clearly died for my sins, and should therefore be utterly worshipped. With roasted potatoes and a good gravy.
Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. —-Mark Twain
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